Make Sure To Ask This Question First


"When you write a very angry letter to a friend who has hurt you deeply, don’t send it! Let the letter sit on your table for a few days and read it over a number of times. Then ask yourself: “Will this letter bring life to me and my friend? Will it bring healing, will it bring a blessing?” You don’t have to ignore the fact that you are deeply hurt. You don’t have to hide from your friend that you feel offended. But you can respond in a way that makes healing and forgiveness possible and opens the door for new life. Rewrite the letter if you think it does not bring life, and send it with a prayer for your friend.”

 – Henri Nouwen

Great advice from Henri Nouwen. Friends are a tremendous gift from God and yet real friends will at times offend and wound us (and let us not forget that we will wound them too). So although it is important to bring truth as you confront and address that friend, it is also equally important to bring grace too.

Email and texting has made it too easy to send out, at light speed, angry and thoughtless words. Take time. Sit prayerfully on your words and don't forget to ask the question, Will what I am about to say bring life to me and my friend?